Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
he laminated a picture of his dick.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Success! We fucked roommates!
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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