My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
