I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
