Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
