What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize