i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
