It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
