I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
