i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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