Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
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