pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I need to sanitize my soul.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
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