I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Randomize
