If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
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