I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
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