So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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