Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
