I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
