All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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