So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
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