I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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