boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Randomize
