I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
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