I will die if light touches me.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Randomize
