dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I need a burrito and a hug.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Randomize