Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
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