i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
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