Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Where is the hickey?
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
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