i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
