he was CRYING into my vagina
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
Randomize
