my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
You dont lie about slip and slides
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
