i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
