Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
