no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Randomize