How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize