I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
