it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Randomize
