i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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