Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Randomize