physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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