You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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