He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
We were destined to go to rehab together
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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