i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize