You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Found the puke drawer
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
Randomize