Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Randomize
