chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Your cock deserves a montage
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
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