that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
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