I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
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