her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
