I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
