He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
