we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
